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Monday, 26 November 2012

its my life..

my life goes like these:

 1) yeay da pukul satuuuuuuu
2) yeayyyyyy da pukul limeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

when pukul 1, im excited  to go for lunch at super crowded cafe
when pukul 5 plak, im thrill to go back to hostel.........

this is my life's cycle ...since..since forever lahhh..CLINICAL PRACTICE yg super best (super tipuu.)
xpe2..walaupom i ni a bit pemalas, tiap2 pagi sy bangun dgn satu semamgat yg sgt membara2 ..nak g hospital.dan buat yg terbaik utk pesakit2 semua..i want to give the best service i can..smile to them..and make them feel comfortable..knowing how it feels to be a patient ( sory da xidea nak tls ape .. Haha wadehel watever who cares ??) (ok dis one was a post yg i da tulis long long time ago tp bile bace ni i rase nak post je :) pls .. Ape2 je)

Wednesday, 21 November 2012

at 21st floor sri maya savanna..again

It was raining cats and dogs..n there was lightning..but who cares..makan dulu ya...walaipon masin, telan je la ye...

Tuesday, 20 November 2012

enjoy the view

(Entry zaman bercinta.. Byk pulak draft cam koya)

The sunny evening was awesome.he came to me and we enjoy the view from 21th floor sri maya savanna..love it

Monday, 19 November 2012

i love being home

(Lame giler nye entry)

I dont know what's wrong with me lately..but im just love being home instead of hospital.hospital just not belong to me..i belong to the zoo with the monkey and kangaroo..wuhuuu..

Wednesday, 3 October 2012

My mom is the strongest women I ever know.

 To my mum,
My rock of proportions
I couldn’t have done it without you..

Assalamualikum everyone…
I know physically I OK and fine  .., but deep inside, no one would understands how I feel about my mom. And yes it’s true that I still shade a tear thinking about her..because the other side of me is a weak girl, pretending to act strong.

Recently, my mom was diagnosed with Diabetic Foot Ulcer, that required the doctors to perform a surgery, to amputate her right lower limb..and although the operation was successfully done, the feeling was so INTENSE. I cant imagine what is the feeling to be my mom. After the operation she looked so calm, talking to us and nurses around her nicely, not even showing how upset she was..she’s so strong, so positive I never thought she will be.. she kept praising the nurses and doctors in the operation theater, saying that they were so good in comforting and motivating her..the moment was like reading or watching a movie where my mom was the main character..and me as the audience, just CRY CRY CRY for sure..

The worst part is not about my mom..but its me. Why im so afraid to tell others about my mom? Hmm,maybe because it’s still a shocking thing to me. To my friends, whose concern about me, thanks for asking me about my mom. Sory that I couldn’t give u the answer, because a part of me still in denial, not fully accepting what ALLAH S.W.T destined my mom..but Insyallah I will fully accept this as a part of test from HIM..just give me some times and pls pray for my mom’s recovery..sob sob..emotional btol tulis entry ni..smpai basah baju..huhu..sob sob..good nite pals!!

Tuesday, 22 May 2012

Admire they not

At library, studying, indeed! It's not a pleasure to see people mating here .. Err I mean dating. It distract my ability to focus on my reference books. Menyampah and geli, nausea, vomiting and suiciding. Pls keep urself away from me. This is library, show some respect la!

Friday, 18 May 2012

wasserong wit moi

adoyai..exam round d corner..and i just love doing nothing while daydreaming...oh oh oh..
make tdo make tdo make tdo...hefty hanna in progress..

Monday, 14 May 2012

Me and Poetry..again


A lecturer coming,
The atmosphere is changing,
5 minutes, 10 minutes, I am counting,
Deep down, I start thinking, hey let's start chatting!

30 slides done, but 120 slides remained yawww,
What?! U've got cat to be kitten me right meow!
But dont worry, let's have a little party now,
Everyone's cooperating, passing the cheese-flavored twisties and candy to every row,
Owh this is much better, seriously yaw!

The time pass by,
Belly fulls with candy,
I start to feel sleepy,
I look in front, crap! The slides remaining is seventyyyyyyy

Ok fine! I love learning..
But sory, now I prefer daydreaming

Ok..credit to my lecturer whose inspired me to write dis poem..in the middle of lecture.hihi

Thursday, 10 May 2012

i got stuck in a boring lecture..what should i do?

in 30 mins..the lecture will take place..physically i look damn OK..with baju kurung and new tudung,  i am confident, full of energy..
deep down, i am...!@#$%$%^!!!
urgh the boring moment will start soon..arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..
doremong, im begging u..let me borrow ur time machine, so that i can fasten the time

list of things to do so the time will move faster:
1) read magazine and stuff..novel etc..
2) poetry ..again
3) continously going to toilet..make a phone call to a random people in my contact list
4) texting in class..tp nak sms ngan sape?? RANDOM
5) day dreaming
6) xde idea da..

ya ALLAH, pls ..i cannot focus today..just let the time move very fast

Friday, 20 April 2012

write me a happy ending

dear myself who no longer a girl, not yet a woman,,,
i have so much to be thankful for..these few weeks have been full up with ups and downs, but mostly ups for sure.. ALLAH has been so good to me, to my life as well.

 now i can focus on my study and feel better yet confident with myself. love love love it! cant say enough about it. CLINICAL PRACTICE has been less that stellar ,but the evenings are devoted to stress free fun. i dont even let myself think about my frustrating day if i ever have once. with great friends around me, im working on a goal to better and better on the next day. 

the biggest thing i am thankful for is my friendship with my besties..they strengthen me in many ways , which build my confidence and stuff...  
thus, for the 1st time ever, i , the brand new Shakespeare write a poem, dedicate to my fellow friends:


 dear my goody girly cheeky CHUBBY girlfriends,
OMG im writing a poem entitled "our friendship  will never end",
and gosh, now your eyes tearing, your heart being touched,
what a pleasure to have me as your bestfriend

your teeth is yellowish, everybody's  familiar with,
but still sharing the same straw, we can bear with,
LANTAKLAH, because its a matter of inner-shine rather than impaired teeth,
hahhahah..dont worry you're always my bestfriends even if u lose ur teeth

da xde idea plak,
ngantuk sgt lepas makan mee goreng mamak...daaaaaaaa


Thursday, 19 April 2012

happy SARAH day and stuff..

today is sarah's birthday, ..hepy birthday to u girlfend..ni la kwn aku yg cari aku time susah je..tp aku stil syg die..see how nice i am..
from the bottom of sarah's heart, she always adore me..tq ae

sarah is at the LEFTest ..the ALBINO one

ok enough with sarah.(eh cam sket sgt plak cte pasal Sarah hehe, but enough is enough .HAPPY BIRTDAY SARAH..nah hadiah utk u

Wednesday, 11 April 2012

speechless wednesday

today cuti..no praktikal..and i was like yeaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy!!!

today's missions is to complete the assignments, but i just end up having a social visit to facebook and youtube..

working is so tiresome, so i rewarded myself lying down on the bed, reading magazines and doing some sorts of unstressed activities..

walaupon byk keje x siap and tgk org laen buat asssignment dgn tekunnye, i personally have nothing to be disappointed or jaded because im kind of person who holding on to a principle which is "the older u are, the wiser u'll be" malam ni i lagi tua, so the wiser i'l be and therefore, the easier for me to complete the assignmet..brilliant enough?

yes, there will always be a few chauvinist along the way u make it go, urgh! but they're always outshone by the rare gems that make u go. because im kind of special girl with outstanding personality..xde kaitan pon, tulis merapu je


Friday, 6 April 2012

i look at myself (in mirror la kan), instead of feeling useless, i sometimes proud of myself

the "good girl"version of myself..best cite ni! seyes rr
Me on the other side is a strong, yet independent girl..the"why-im-proud-of-myself" lists would go longer and longer if i make a proper one..but then i make it short..because im too humble..haha WADAHEL..here's the positive side of me:
  1. Whenever i drive alone, i prefer not to waste my time to stop and ask directions. Better to drive round and round looking like i know where exactly im going...signboard kan banyak..boring ngan org yg selalu bg alasan x tahu jln..duhh
  2. sometimes when i make a mistake, i cam miraculously chalk it up as a learning experience and even sleep soundly at night. 
  3.  i live independently..g jumpe lecturer without a company, unlike other girls..( realy proud of myself)
  4. im trying so hard to be a responsible  class leader even though i dont really enjoy seeing and discuss matters with lecturers. i inevitably facing these questions: to be liked or to be bitched by other students because i believe that certain people might have some major problems with my attitude/personality
  5. i rarely fail to apologize whenever i make a mistake
  6. i dont afraid to go to toilet alone at 2 or 3 am..im cool ha?
  7. i personally love to help people ( nak suruh i anta g stesen bus blh je..i realy dont mind..what's the point to hv a car if u cannot help others..)
  8. im not STINGY person.it feels good to offer candy/biscuit/mint to everyone in class... i realy hate those who are stingy..examples as follows:
  • makan beskut dlm kelas..tp x offer pon kt kwn2..hey i bukan nak sgt beskut u, but then its actualy impolite to eat infront of others ..bese la kat kelas pagi2 kan..everybody is starving..kalo org laen nye beskut cepat je die mintak..
  • kalo terpinjam duit die, 10 sen pon mintak..sekali sekala tu halal halal jela..
  • i remember back mase i msk dgn one of my fren, i think it was instant macaroni cheese..but it turns out that out macaroni cheese x menjadi sgt..tp kitorang mkn je..da lapa sgt..time tu kitorang ade ajak sorang kwn mkn same2..die plak ade bawak nasi ngan lauk ikan kicap, sotong bagai...die end up mkn je nasi die depan2 kitorang tanpa offer sket pon..haha nak tegelak je i tgk die mkn..so childish..kot ye pon offer la sket kt kitorang..(xde la nak sgt pon tp come on la...macaroni ktorang u mkn plak..adoi, x pandai berbudi langsung)..
mkn beskut sowang2..dekut !


Monday, 26 March 2012

me being a class leader is SUX

with everything that's been going on lately, i've been SO distracted and i'd probably forget my head if it wasnt attached to my neck.SERIOUSLY
PLZ allow me to bang myself now

         i never know that being a class leader can sometimes be so stressful. ya i got to admit that when lecturer got mad with me because of other student's mistake, the feeling is just so intense..and nothing i can do except blabbering  and give a free lecture to 'innocent-body-of-mine" (innocent ke?) , blaming myself that im not good enough to be a leader..and despite my face and body language remained completely unemotional, inside i always feel  a sudden surge of anger at everything, everyone..which make me such a complete hypocrite. huh! dear ALLAH, pls calm me down, and show me the right path..
gambar sekadar hiasan..wishing that i ca be this "cool"

another thing that i'm suck is when it comes to phone calls and text messages..usually when i checked my phone there will be like 5 unread messages and 7 or 8 miscalls from lecturers. so any important messages that i need to inform to other students only delivered to me 2 hours later..perhaps im not the type of person who got attached with my cell phone all the time..whenever im doing something important, lets say watching a movie(important ae?), i technically forget the fact that i own a cellphone.IM AWFUL AND HORRIBLE and i know it
sekali lagi aku letak gamna yg xde kaitan

OFFICIAL lists of how PATHETIC i am as a class leader:
 1) im not close with lecturer, im not friendly with them..
2) some students inform or discuss anything with lecturer without telling me 1st..i think its not fair for me, at             least inform me 1st so when other classmates ask me anything im not surprised with any changes made (well im the class leader, but it seems that i know the least..)
3) when people not paying attention the moment im announcing something in front of class, which required me to ask somebody else to do that for me.
4) when someone forward emotional SMS and people thought it was from me

hmm k la..byk lagi senanye nak tulis, but no idea,,the point is i clearly cannot satisfies everybody but one thing i can do is to do the best.. (w0w now im so SHAKESPEARE) bye!

Friday, 23 March 2012

some random stuff, sarah, and syasya

hello again my diary, i am back with my mind so bloated after helping a form 2 boy with his MATHs
ok back to the story. i would love to say that i personally hate maths  maths. why almost of the question would have the sign of  "x" and "y" and asking to find the value of them.

like this simple question:

 x/43 = 1150, find the value of x?

HOMAIGOD, obviously there's only one" x" there..duhh! this always prove my theory that maths today is no longer makes any sense..i remember back in kindergarten where maths used to be realy fun..
the question would be fun and REAL..like this one:

1 chipsmore cookie plus another chipsmore cookie is...

 see how real it is..i bet now u agree with me..

ok ok..enough with the annoying story on how i basically doing my community servises.. well upon writing this, i actualy wanted to write something about my besties . tp cam xde idea plak. ok la just post couple of photos i had with them last few weeks ago..this little "hangout" practically release a "feel-good" hormone within my body ..coz tese girls realy rocks my dayy

from left: albino sarah, diabetic syasya and normal hana.

upon the meeting, we keep talking and laughing. the only moment that all of us keep quite is whenever we saw a dog . everybody was freaking out and acting like a statue..huhu..bengong punye anjing.. 

oh god how comfy is syasya's shoulder..tp ade bau ketiak ahh

see the tenderness on my face..udoh gile. hey sarah, u ingat u askar u blh buli i ke? tgk muke buruk pon aku publish je.x mcm oprg tu nk yg lawa je.nyampah!

we met at syasya's house and we sent sarah to UPNM. lepak2 jap had lunch together..telling stupid jokes..laughing so hard and non stop gosiping..that's the best activities to do with ur best buddy..

lets watch the rugby tournament..

sometimes i feel like im a part of UPNMstudent..oh how cool to  be askar..damn
monkey move..act dis photo has sarah in it..but  she practically doenst want to be included coz she said she doesnt look good..thats what makes me wonder, siince when she ever looks good? 
syasya always loves me..tq eh

Add caption
since sarah doesnt want to be included, so i cropped her out..booo
sile jgn menyambah.! suke ati i la nak dok cane pon
we are so gayyyy
saying im immature doesnt turn u into a mature person

ok bye..too busy today..too many things to do today..x caye? here's the list of things to do..check it out:

Monday, 5 March 2012

i went out with an army..fooling myself like the most desperate girl on planet earth

hello again my diary,
i am back with my heart pounding, regretting every moment that i spent with a guy named FAIZ (bukan nama sebenar)..why on earth i went out with him???..oh universe pls forgive me for going out with a random guy that i barely know just because i was freaking boring and lonely....universe answered : HANA U'RE SO PATHETIC..HE JUST WANTS TO WASTE HIS TIME AND GOING OUT WITH U WAS A GOOD OPTION AND GIVING HIM A CLEAR SIGNS OF HOW DESPERATE U ARE..
ngorat la i plzzzz

official lists of awkward moments i had with him:

  1. we both had no idea where to go
  2. both don't know what to eat
  3. no idea what to talk about
  4. so awkward with each other    
  5. i cant even see him on the eyes..coz im afraid he will look at my UGLY n STRESS face (im a total idiot..we not even a couple..y should i bother about this thing..arghhhh 
  6. i tried to cheer him up by telling some jokes..but i just received no respond from him...(should i suicide now????)
  7. i wore a 4 inches high heel..but he walked damn fast..leaving me alone... ( malu ke jln dgn i??
  8. i cant hear what he's saying..it was like he talked with volume 0..
  9. after he sent me home, i texted him to say a TQ..but i receive no reply from him (what does this means?)
  10. HE KEEPS TEXTING SOMEONE WHOM I HAD NO IDEA WHO is he/she. His smartphones seem to be the biggest distractions.  
    now im blaming myself for not wearing this shirt.

erk..not this awkward..

he however teach me loads of very vulnerable lessons which are:
  1. never going out with a guy that u barely know
  2. never wear high heel whenever u're out with a guy
  3. never ask a guy to give u a ride..drive ur own car..
  4. never tell any joke..if u want to tell joke, make sure u tell it out loud so that u wont end up receiving no respond..

i rather going out with a robot in future

Sunday, 26 February 2012

Post tittle: CLINICAL PRACTICE is always lame and only give any medical-based students wit a headache and Chronic Brain Death along with symptoms of Toxic Megacolon that require them to undergo Barium Enema Study ( am i sound so medical now??)

Assalamuaikum ..
Dear 'not a diary nor a famous blog',
Sincerely it is a pleasure to express my emotion here whenever things is about not to happen exactly the way I want it to be..

This afternoon was a total 'I-feel-like-crying-and-jumping-out-of-the-window' moment ever. I still not quite ready to let go of how awkward and upset I feel about the next CLINICAL PRACTICE's schedule..I really want to let it go and handle this kind of problem in private and mature manner but somehow it stuck in my 'not-so-brilliant ' brain..and for certain reasons , I found out that some of my classmates are belong to planet SELFISH..what the hell I'm talking about.. At this point, of course everybody is being selfish..but why I'm not letting myself being selfish and fight till I get what I want? Well I think it just not me..sometimes it's good to sacrifice something and make other people happy ...what a nice girl I am!!! ( err...am I praising myself?)

Ok since I want to handle this problem in very mature way possibe, I promised myself not to hear nor talking about about CP although everybody is crazy about it. So I made my self a clear llist of approved activities in class to avoid just anything about CP

1. standing quietly
2. Sitting quietly
3. Standing and sitting over n over again quietly..
4. Continuously going to toilet.
5. Chatting with Mira in an appropriate, nonthreatening way..
6. Listening to lecturers tell stories about their lives.
7. Yoga (err..I'm not sure about this since I have no idea what yoga is..then y I put it in my list?? I DON'T KNOW)
8. poetry
9. Yoga and poetry at the same time
10. picking up trash and GENTLY dispose it ..( GLOBA WARMING..save the planet..is it global warming has anything to do with trash?? )
11. Taking a nap
12. Singing ( only in my heart so no one will hear it)

Ps: despite physically I sound and looking strong and independent yet a bit chubby lately, but deep down I'm just ANOTHER GIRL, who loves ice-cream, shopping and movies ..er cam xde kaitan je????

A question from me..
Is it laughing is the best best medicine or crying is the best medicine?
My answer will be both..but plz control the way u laugh and cry because people might misinterpret u as retarded OR mentally ill OR specifically, INSANE!

Friday, 27 January 2012

must read novels dis months

lately, im sooo into vampire.but dat doenst turn me into vampire ya!.thanx to the "notes from a totally lame vampire", now im obsess with every series that have vampire in it..so i would like to suggest these series as they aree sooo ohh semmm! read them, and im pretty sure u will like them! available at most independent book stores..credit to the author KIMBERLY PAULEY.

  Sucks To Be Me is a humorous look at life through the eyes of Mina Hamilton, Teen Vampire (Maybe) and this hugely enjoyable book is highly recommended reading for younger female readers.

2) still sucks to be me

3) sucks to be MOI

Sunday, 22 January 2012

10 reasons y im not a malay novel freak..

  1.  both hero n heroin are so perfect
  2.  both hero n heroin are so perfect
  3.  both hero n heroin are so perfect
  4.  both hero n heroin are so perfect
  5.  both hero n heroin are so perfect
  6.  both hero n heroin are so perfect
  7.  both hero n heroin are so perfect
  8.  both hero n heroin are so perfect
  9.  both hero n heroin are so perfect
  10.  both hero n heroin are so perfect
are u clear now??? 

Saturday, 21 January 2012

buku ni best..

summary: Like Edward Cullen in "Twilight", Nigel Mullet was transformed into a vampire when he was still a teenager, and will remain this age forever. Unfortunately, Nigel became a vampire at the awkward age of fifteen, and must spend eternity coping with acne, a breaking voice, and an ineptitude with girls...In this, his excruciatingly funny diary, Nigel chronicles his increasingly desperate attempts to be noticed by the love of his life, Della Sparrow, the constant mortification caused by his vampire parents (not to mention the worry that they might accidentally eat one of his friends), and the frustration one feels when you've got the whole of boring eternity stretching out in front of you and you can't even have a lie in (vampires don't sleep). Forced to hang out with the Goths and emo kids due to his pale skin and social awkwardness, and constantly battling his embarrassingly overwhelming desire to sink his fangs into Della's neck, will Nigel ever get his girl? Fantastically witty and hugely enter taining, this fun and accessible diary will appeal to any fan of "Twilight" or "Adrian Mole", teenage or otherwise...

Thursday, 19 January 2012

this is soo not me!

      Once you start to dislike someone, everything they do begins to annoy you. btol tuuu...
but how about if u start to like someone? everything they do will please u..yep!..btol jugak..
  why im talking about dis? bcoz currently my body is suffering with a symptom of "like-n-syok-kat-someone-who-already-have-girlfren-even-muke-die-x-hensem-" syndrome.

        once upon a time, i used to hate dis guy, everything he said was so annoying (sorry dude ,I don't actualy hate you, Its just..My attitude has some major issues with your personality),..but.. but suddenly a miracle happened..i keep stalking him on facebook, just to know what he's doing ( well, checking hist current status on fb), even worst, i do some stalking on his girlfren page( am i mentally ill or retarded????)..hmm..just not sure what's realy happening to me rite now? am i conscious? or semi-conscious? or in comatose?  WATEVA
                                   You've cat to be kitten me right meow.!! 
                                            ~end of storeeyyyyyy~~

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